Many people want to develop a good habit, because a good habit can still do a good thing for a long time. This good thing, every time you do it will bring a certain amount of good influence. And a good impact of time and again stacked, after a relatively long period of time, can make a person’s some aspects of a huge positive change. And many people try to develop habits but have trouble sticking to them. Instead, they resort to a lot of external forces to “supervise” themselves, which in turn makes them more painful.
I think the root cause of this is a lack of strong intrinsic motivation. Let’s say you want to learn a foreign language. You know that learning a foreign language can have all sorts of benefits. But you know in your heart that these benefits are just icing on the cake and will not affect your future. You can’t fool yourself, and I’m not here to suggest that it’s important to keep implying that learning a foreign language is important. I’m not here to suggest that it’s important to keep suggesting that learning a foreign language is important, I’m here to suggest that it’s only effective if you make learning a foreign language really important to you. For example, let’s say you enrolled in a program to study abroad as part of your life plan and spent a lot of money on a contract. You are now in a position where you can’t afford not to learn it. If you don’t learn it, your life plan won’t be completed, and the money you spent to sign the contract has gone down the drain. In this way, a strong internal drive is created. Once this internal drive is created, it will keep reminding you within you, keep spurring you on, and make you automatically pick up the foreign language book. Unless, you have some reason to reject it, your laziness won’t pass you by in yourself.
Another important point I have found is that habits are made in accordance with nature, and above all in accordance with your own heart. You can’t, say, make a habit for yourself that you don’t like. If you don’t like something and you have to force yourself to do it, you’re not going to end up doing it. Whether you like something or not, mainly depends on whether you will have a sense of pleasure before you do it first, you can think of what you can gain after you do it, which makes you feel pleasure. There is a sense of pleasure that can remind you to do something from time to time.
The third point is to stick to it for a long time instead of all the time. You can’t say that you have to force yourself to stick to a certain habit all the time, because habits are slowly changed as your life continues. Stick to it over time, which means over a long period of time, you are going to be doing it regularly. Just because you don’t do it once or twice in a while doesn’t mean the habit is gone or broken. Because matters don’t run smoothly, there are always repetitions. So give yourself a little time to do things differently or not to do the thing and put yourself in a more relaxed state. Remember, the surplus is the deficit, so let yourself always swim a little, allow some small lazy, the process of habit formation will not have a big revenge fluctuation. In the process of developing habits, you may find that this habit is not a good habit, or does not suit you. At this time, please give up the habit decisively. This is because habit formation is a positive feedback, a process of motivating yourself and making gains, not a process of pulling yourself and your inner self.
Another thing is that habit formation should not interfere with your normal routine. You can’t say I’m going to memorize words today, not do it due to some unforeseen circumstances, and then finish it late at night, squeezing you out of your bedtime. This is not worth the effort, but rather, because of the disruption of their own life cycle, into a situation of exhaustion, resulting in the habit is more and more difficult to develop.
Finally, how do you know if a habit has been developed? When you realize that something seems to be missing when you don’t do it today. Or, when you automatically remember to do it at a certain time. At this point, you can consider the habit formed, you just go with it, enjoy the habit of inertia to bring you joy, in the process, you can continue to harvest their own growth and happiness in some way.